So we have broken up about 2 weeks now. We still talk. But it's not the same anymore.
And I thought I was doing okay.
Truth is, I'm not okay.
My nights are empty without you.
Everytime something good happens, the first person i wanna tell would be you.
When things go bad, the first person i wanna talk to would be you.
If I have something to complain, the first person I wanna complain to would be you.
But then I realise, you're not there anymore. And it hurts.
"I'm your xmas present. do what you want." I guess I just lost my gift.
I feel so stupid, sitting here missing all the times we had. Sitting here missing you.
I fucking miss you all day, everyday. And you have no idea how pathetic it makes me feel because i have no idea if you miss me back.
Seeing you in college everyday isn't exactly helping the situation either.
But i guess that just because you miss someone, it doesn't mean they belong in your life.
I don't understand why someone so perfect had to come into my life and then just leave.
You knew it wasn't gonna work, but you still went with it. and then left me broken in pieces.
You may see me smiling around college, but deep inside, I don't mean it. because I'm so hurt to the point where I don't even wanna see your shadow. seriously.
Because every fucking time I see you, my heart just dies. Everyday, I'll die over and over again.
I can never look at you another way ever again. Instead of knowing you as just the senior in 3rd year, i see you as my ex-boyfriend. fml?
I keep telling myself that things will be better eventually, but you know what, it's not. It's fcking not getting okay. I'm not okay. I'm tired of pretending like I don't care. When inside, I really do care. A lil too much.
i've totally given up on x'mas. because i know no matter how much i ask for it, you're never coming back.
